Col.3v12-15: Therefore, as the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering, bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do. But above all, these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection. And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful.

How do you deal with the troubled areas of your relationship, especially your marital relationship? This and many more are what we intend to deal with in this series of lessons. There are areas of challenges in any marriage, and it’s important to know how to overcome them! Conflicts basically are areas of disagreement, differences, and argument. Our text scripture helps us see that to live in peace and harmony. You need to embrace certain kinds of attitudes and behavior. With the right kind of attitude and conduct, it’s possible to resolve our conflicts amicably. So are you ready to resolve your conflicts with your spouse? This is an important question that you need to answer!

From my experience over the years, I have been able to observe some areas of conflicts in relationships that I want to share with you and they are as follows:

Sex, Money, Decision Making, Raising Kids, Expectations, Infertility, Extended Family, Parenting, Preferences, Bad Habits, Chores, Incompatibility, etc. These are just some of the common kinds of differences that couples often have to deal with. But, by his grace in this series, my intention is to show us how we can resolve our challenges properly!

According to Dr. John Gottaman, a leading family marriage counselor, 69% of marriage conflicts are never resolved. I know this may look strange to us, but he actually meant that Couples are often having the same fights repeatedly. According to him, this is actually good news because:

– It means that couples have similarities to their fights.

– It means couples can study, predict and course-correct their arguments before they explode.

So we can actually profit from our fights if we have the correct kind of perspective. However, God’s will and plan is for you to be able to resolve your conflicts with your spouse no matter what it’s all about (Matt.5v23-24).

This leads me to an interesting question “Why should you resolve your conflicts? This is an important question that needs to be answered adequately.

WHY SHOULD YOU RESOLVE YOUR CONFLICTS?

1. So that your peace won’t be stolen or hampered. Without peace, there can be no meaningful progress and achievement. So peace is so crucial in our homes because the absence of it affects every other thing. In fact, turbulence and trouble prevail in the absence of peace. So this is why you need to be a peacemaker in your home (Rom.12v18: 14v19).

2. So that your prayers won’t be hindered. Unforgiveness and bitterness are some of the reasons for unanswered prayers. So if you want God to answer your prayers, be on good terms with your spouse. This is why you just can’t afford not to resolve your conflicts amicably (1Pet.3v7; Col.3v13).

3. So that Satan won’t have a foothold in your home. You need to understand that Satan is an opportunist. He is always looking for avenues of infiltrating into your homes and conflicts is one of such means by which he comes in. This is why you must not allow him at all. My dear reader, give no place or room for Satan. Doing so will allow him to hinder your progress and joy. This is why you need to be a peacemaker at all costs to preserve your marriage and home (2Cor.2v11; Eph.4v27).

I pray that Satan will not be able to destroy the peace and happiness of your home in Jesus name, amen.

Other Scriptural References: (Jn.10v10; Eccl.4v9; Mk.11v25-26; Heb.12v14; Rom.16v20; 2Thess.2v16; Matt.18v15-17; Eph.4v31-32; 1Pet.4v8).

Prayer for Today: Heavenly Father, I chose to work towards the well-being of my family at all times. This is my desire and commitment that I make today in Jesus name, amen.

CONFESSION: My home is my first ministry and his grace determines me in making a success of my marriage. I refuse to allow bitterness, unforgiveness, malice, and any misunderstanding of any sort to destroy my home. As I walk together with the Holy Spirit and his Word, I am becoming a better manager of conflicts in my Marriage in Jesus name, amen.