Proverbs 21verse9 ‘It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.’
The Word of God admonishes us to live in peace as much as possible. This is certainly one thing that you need in your home as a married person. This is why you need to know how to deal with contentions or areas of conflict in your marriage. By the way, what do we mean by areas of contentions or conflicts?
Basically, we mean:
-Areas of heated dispute, arguments or controversies.
-The things that we fight, fuss or argue about.
-Areas of discord in our marriage or problematic areas in our marriage.
So, what kind of attitude or behaviour do you need to avoid if you want to achieve harmony in your home? To be successful in resolving contentious areas in your marriage, avoid the following kinds of behaviour:
1. Avoid keeping scores with your partner. In order words, do away with resentments, bitterness, envy or unforgiveness as much as possible. Eph4v31-32. Always chose to be a forgiver!
2. Avoid abusive Words towards each other. You need to have control over this important area of conflict management. Tame and take charge of your mouth. Your words have the power to ignite or quench fire; it just depends on how you use them. So, my dear reader, be mindful of what you say to your spouse. As Shakespeare once said: Mend your speech a little, lest it may mar your fortunes.Pro15v1; Col3v8.
3. Avoid being defensive or trying to prove yourself right. This won’t help you in the long run, so be brutally honest and sincere with your spouse. Rom12v9.
4. Avoid bottling things up. This is why you need to speak up and speak out. A closed mouth is a closed destiny. Don’t ever allow yourself to be eaten up by the issues that bothers your heart. This is why talking is therapeutic in nature.
5. Avoid being confrontational or physical with your spouse. No matter the level of provocation or insults, it must never degenerate to this point because Satan has a way of using physical abuse or being confrontational to ultimately harm and destroy your home. So give him no place and space. Eph4v27.
My dear brothers and sisters, make sure you do everything in your power and wisdom to avoid the things we have shared today to walk in peace and harmony in your home. Join me in our next lesson as we continue this Interesting Series.
Other Scriptural References: Col3v13-14: Rom12v18, 21; Pro12v6, 13, 18: 21v19.
Prayer for Today: Heavenly Father, help me to be a doer of these words in Jesus name, amen.
CONFESSION: I receive your grace and help in obeying your Word. I choose to honour your Word above my feelings or emotions. I subject my mind and emotions to the authority of your Word. As I obey your words, help me maintain the atmosphere of peace and harmony in my home in Jesus name, amen.
Yemi Adeoti is a pastor, teacher, life coach and mentor & also a prolific writer.
Amen